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Monday, July 11, 2005

The Rapture 

So I have no doubt that you're familiar with The Rapture. You know, the event wherein the righteous are taken bodily up into heaven leaving the rest of us down here to live/die through a long really sucky time with lots lamentations and gnashing of teeth and rending of clothes (frankly, the clothes rending sounds kind of fun, but that's just me). You've probably even seen the competing bumper stickers: Warning: In case of Rapture this car will be driverless vs Come the Rapture can I have your car? When it comes to The Rapture I have an hypothesis: The Rapture has already happened and nobody made the cut. All those stick-up-their-butts Fundies with their "My God is bigger than your God" talk forgot to actually read the Bible to find out what they have to actually do to get through the Pearly Gates and God turned them down.

So, damnit, I don't get a slightly used, driverless car for free.


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